Having Social Anxiety - Here are 4 Tips to Help

Social anxiety can be rather annoying to deal with and grueling to overcome. It causes an overwhelming reaction to basic daily interactions.

Going to the grocery store can make you shaky. Eating in a public restaurant may make you feel dizzy. Fear of being rejected by a coworker during an interaction might make you nervous.

Sometimes even just thinking about having to do a social activity can kick in crippling anxiety and intense stress. With social anxiety, this fear and these reactions dictate more of your life than anyone would like.

It is estimated that 15 million people deal with social anxiety, so if this is you, you’re not alone. Here are some tips to start to tackle your anxiety and take back control.

Practice Relaxation Techniques

Physical reactions to social anxiety are common and include sweating, heart racing, stomach aches, lightheadedness, and sweating. An effective way to combat your physical symptoms is by incorporating relaxation techniques when your anxiety flares up.

Focus on controlled and productive breathing. Often, when a person becomes anxious, their breathing becomes shallow and rushed without even realizing it. Pay attention to your breathing changes and try to keep it slow and take deep breaths. Try using a 4-7-8 breathing pattern where you breathe in for four counts, hold for seven counts, and then exhale over eight counts. If this is too much, try a box-breathing approach where you complete each in four counts.

Another way to reduce tension in the body is through progressive muscle relaxation. Focus on tensing specific muscle groups and then relaxing them. It distracts some from anxiousness and forces you to mindfully relax.

Avoid Negative Coping Strategies

Since social anxiety causes both internal and external symptoms in unavoidable social situations, many people turn to coping strategies that dull some of these effects, particularly alcohol use and recreational substance use.

While it might sound like a good idea and feel relatively harmless, it actually can cause your anxiety to be worse. One drink may lead to another and another due to increasing discomfort, causing undesirable results.

Reframe Your Thoughts

Stress is often viewed as a bad thing, and anyone with social anxiety knows that it comes with a good deal of stress. A stress reaction is how the body prepares itself for a given situation. Resources are being pulled in internally, blood flow increases to needed muscle groups, and oxygen flow also increases. Sometimes, the body gets it wrong, and the situation it prepares for is more of a false alarm.

Knowing how and why your body responds can make the experience less uncomfortable. Having an understanding that this social situation that is getting you worked up is, in fact, just a false alarm, can ease some of that anxiety.

Challenge your negative thoughts on the situation with something positive. Counter your fear with three positive affirmations. Practice realistic thinking by asking yourself scenario questions and answering them honestly. If your mind goes straight to disaster, challenge that with a thought about the best or most likely outcome.

Practice Kindness

This may or may not seem like common sense, but research has shown a link between an act of kindness and a decrease in social anxiety. Fear of rejection is often at the root of your anxiety. Doing something kind for someone that can give you a positive reaction may help reduce some of that fear.

Kind acts can activate an area in your brain tied to mood and a motivation-reward cycle. They distract from the fear and nervousness and help reduce avoidance of certain situations.

Understanding the source and triggers of your social anxiety can truly help you manage and overcome your symptoms. Therapy can be a game changer in learning the tools necessary. If you are struggling with social anxiety and would like to learn more, contact us today.

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